Puns for the educated minds

Puns for the educated minds…

How does Moses make his tea?
Hebrews it.

A cartoonist was found dead in his home.
Details are sketchy.

I used to be a banker,
but then I lost interest.

England has no kidney bank,
but it does have a Liverpool .

They told me I had type-A blood,
but it was a Type-O.

I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic.
It’s syncing now.

I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid,
but he says he can stop any time.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went,
and then it dawned on me.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.
I just can’t put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns.
It was a play on words.

Why were the Indians able to settle here first?
They had reservations.

We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory.
I hope there’s no pop quiz.

I didn’t like my beard at first.
Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection….
you know urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pretty much pointless.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I dropped out of the Communism class because of lousy Marx.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro – what a rip off!